Monday, April 30, 2012

Day 177

At about 7:11 pm Friday evening, I had hit my breaking point.

All day had been bad—all week had been bad.  On the verge of an emotional breakdown, I wanted to crumble.  I wanted to throw in my heels and get back into my car and drive home.

But I didn’t.

Instead I walked through the door of a house on Rozelle Street, and instantly melted.


A rainbow of rose petals layered the floor, dim lighting from floating candles shadowed the room, and faces of beautiful young women surrounded me.  I recognized many of the women from church, and scattered in between them were men—not just men, but men who had dressed themselves in the robes of servants for the night in honor of Valentine's Day.  Brothers serving their sisters.

Dinner was the first part of the evening.  The men brought our meals to us as we talked, and then cleared our plates as we finished.  After a dessert of cheesecake squares, we were escorted outside.  Limos awaited.  We were taken for a short cruise around town while the men set up for what was to come next.


The limos headed downtown.  It was as the Memphis bridge came into focus that I sat quietly, drinking in the earlier moments and savoring the lights before me.  I had never seen the bridge like this, and I knew I would never again see it in this way.  This night was one never to be recreated.

On our arrival back, I still felt dazed, overwhelmed, by the complete surrender of the men.  Quiet, chivalrous, attentive, it was a world I had never seen and never thought I would experience while here on earth.

The men took our coats as we filed back into the house.  When we walked in, we were met with a dance floor, which is where we spent the rest of night.

Each act so deeply appreciated and treasured, I think all the women were grateful.  And as we danced the last dance, my heart overflowing with joy and wonder, I could not escape the deep feeling of gratitude.  For the men, for God who had created them, and for the women whose hearts were as light as mine.

It was an amazing evening, and a moment in time I will treasure always.


I wrote this two months ago after an unforgettable night.  Words scribbled on the back of a church bulletin, I wanted to remember every moment.

Rereading this, it feels as if it was just yesterday.  It is so vivid in my mind how the evening unwound.  I felt so blessed and so thankful.  I have some amazing brothers in Christ, and I am so grateful to God for sharing them with me—for letting me experience love in such a pure way.

It took a long time to get here, to a point where I stopped objectifying men and started trusting them—trusting in their love for God—where six months ago, I didn’t.  I didn’t want to and I didn’t think any man was worth trusting.  I didn’t expect to ever be able to trust them.  And here I am now, being loved and loving them as my brothers.

Each day I spend with a guy friend, I am encouraged.  I am encouraged by him, and by how God is opening my heart.  I get to see God working in their lives, in their hearts.  I get to see how they treat other women, other men.  I get to be loved with no ulterior motives, and I get to love without ulterior motives.

I think that’s why I was so scared to be single.  I used to equate special moments as only being possible being in love, and I thought being single meant that special couldn’t exist—that I’d be missing out.

But every day He’s reminding that “special” exists anywhere.  In small moments just as in big moments.  In any friendship.  In any place.  At any time.

There’s a possibility to love in every moment, thanks to Christ.  All I have to do is seize the opportunity, and know that the only way I will miss out is if I surrender to missing out.  It has nothing to do with being single or not.

And because of that, "single" isn’t so scary anymore.  Every day is a new adventure.  And, actually, I have more love today than I've had in all my years to dating.  Thanks be to God for His hand in my life, opening my heart, creating friendships, and creating within His children hearts for Him. 

Though, let me not deceive you, these 177 days have been trying and difficult.  But also, more importantly, oh so blessed.  The rewards far outweigh the trials, and continue to do so.
And something tells me the best is still yet to come.


Let brotherly love continue (Hebrews 13:1).

Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8).