She came in alone today.
She hadn’t been alone the last few times we saw her.
Wearily, in a soft tone, as I welcomed her, she said, “You know my husband passed away.”
And I quieted.
“Four months to the day of his diagnosis, he passed away.”
And when she departed, my prayers went with her.
When we first met them, it was almost four months ago.
Initially, because of her father’s recent passing, they were coming in to update files. Flustered, quick-tempered, a type of anxiety was written on the husband’s face.
At the end of a frustrated hour, he seemed to exhale in a way of saying, Look, I’m going to level with you…
“I’m dying…”
At his openness, we were all silenced.
Diagnosed with cancer—a diagnosis that sealed his soon departure from this world—he had but one care.
“I need to know she’s going to be taken care of when I’m gone.”
And I remember that moment. He said it with strength, dignity, and pure love for his wife. He fought the tears, but I sensed his desperation, his need for everything to be done and done right.
This was man who was not fighting cancer. He wasn’t even fighting the bank. No, he was fighting for her.
And as she walked away from our office today, I remembered his love for her. Accepting his diagnosis and trusting God, his priority went from his own health to her wellbeing.
And how special that was for me to see a man love his beloved so much as to make sure she was cared for in the midst of his own personal struggles.
Can you imagine the strength, the trust in God throughout his last months? Knowing what was to come, being prayerful, but being proactive and seeking out her welfare.
One flesh.
One flesh.
A shift in my heart came.
The last few months God has been showing me images of true love. Of sacrificial love. And whenever He reminds me of a love searching out the good for others, I am reassured in my singleness.
As my standards and expections are raised by examples of His love, I know that either I’ll have a husband that fights to sacrifice…or I won’t.
The next guy I date will be special. There is no doubt in my mind that He is giving these examples to me for a purpose.
His will or no will.
I prayed for her tonight, praying for peace in her heart at her loss, but mostly praising the beauty in her having experienced His love here on earth through him, and knowing that she’ll one day see the man who sacrificed for her right next to the God who sacrificed for all.
