Dear God,
Before I lay my head down tonight I want to tell You how much I love You. I am so thankful for all You have done and all You have given me and all through which You have taken me.
Who would of thought that the journey and the destination could be one in the same? You are my end, and You are always right beside me. You have always been right beside me.
You heard my pleas as a child, as a teenager, as a young adult. You heard my cry for love. And You have given it to me. You graced me with humanly love.
But greater than that, You gave me You. You gave me the Holy Spirit to lead me and You gave me Your love, Your blood, Your Son. You gave up everything, and You took everything from me. All the bad, all that I thought was good and You replaced it with You. You broke down my heart and You are rebuilding it. Piece by piece, I feel Your hands molding me. I hear Your voice changing me. I see Your vision for my life. The deepest, darkest, loneliest valleys cannot keep me from You.
If You were to take everything from me, I would still love You. What You have given me, the joy that I've experienced here on earth, the joy I've experienced in You is just a taste of what being with You in Heaven will be like. I will be with You, my Father, my Lover, my Redeemer.
You answer prayer after ungrateful prayer. For a father who has not led, You give me men of Your Word who are showing me how to trust and love again in an honest, pure way. For a childhood spent unloved, You've personally delivered those who love me now. You keep showing me Your love, letting me sample Your greatness in Your human form. Formed from Your image, I see You in so many of those around me. Not idolizing them, but appreciating their hearts for You. Not comparing myself to them, but loving them.
I used to think You were so selfish. Praise, worship, revolve. I used to laugh at You. And now I see You. I see Your love. Your grace. And how You chose me, a sinner, an ugly, desperate sinner, and gave me life. I suffered so that I see the greatness...the love...the redemption for what it is and for what it can be. A love so strong, a healing so deep, a relationship so true...this is You.
You are forever my judge, and I am forever Your witness...I am Yours. Do what You will with my life. Rip me apart. Rebuild me. Carve me. Develop me. Hurt me. Heal me. Because I know that what You do is all for Your goodness, Your greatness, Your glory. Let my heart be weighted down by Your love, always remembering Your sacrifice. Let my choices, my voice resound in echoes of truth and love and kindness. Let me always be conscious of those around me and how I can best glorify You. Let my words be wise. Let my heart be generous. Let my hands be reaching.
Let my life be not about me. Let my life be of You.
Let my life shine Your light.
Let me focus on Your will.
Let me not focus on me.
Let me know You so that I may share You.
Let me never forget all You have done. Let me not forget what brought me here. Let me be led by You, now and always.
Sin is great, but You are greater.
You are greater, my God, our God. Our faithful, loving, sweet, sweet Father.
